athousandwinds: (nosuchthing)
Name 5 characters you would not want to trade lives with.

God, where do I start?

1. Johanna, Sweeney Todd. Groomed for molestation by her father-figure, forced into a mental asylum (one of my personal nightmares) with a serial killer biological father and a mad prostitute bio mum, in danger of her life from an insane murderer and finally getting to run away with a guy she's just met and who has no real idea of just what kind of hell she's been through.

(I really should write that post-musical fic where Johanna starts stabbing people right and left with her needlework scissors.)

2. Basil Hallward, The Picture of Dorian Gray. Or anyone Dorian screws over, really, Sibyl Vane or Adrian Singleton or Alan Campbell. At least Sibyl Vane and Alan Campbell get to kill themselves, though. Basil gets to be hopelessly in love with Dorian for years and to be murdered by him at the moment he realises exactly what Dorian is (and what Dorian has done to his awesome painting).

3. John Hilliard, Strange Meeting. He goes through life so painfully repressed it's hard to bear (for the reader, anyway). When he finally does find someone he can open up to, first he quarrels with them and then they die. (That's not even a spoiler: it's blatantly obvious from the moment Barton walks onto the page that someone as cheerful and good-natured as he is in a WWI novel is doomed to be first demoralised and then killed brutally.)

4. Buffy. Just...Buffy.

5. Anyone from Watchmen. Especially Rorschach. The others all have compensations for their miserable existences (philosophy, vast riches, love) but Rorschach, no. I think that's why I find him even more disturbing than the Comedian; at least the Comedian gets some enjoyment out of life, however loathesome.

Oh, I should post my Porn Battle entries:

Keys to the Kingdom [Sweeney Todd, Johanna/Anthony]

'Tis Pity She's a Whore [Sweeney Todd, Judge Turpin/Lucy Barker]

Right is Might [Raffles, Raffles/Bunny]

Entertaining Angels Unawares [The Picture of Dorian Gray, Dorian/Basil]

Transatlantic Relations [Indiana Jones/The Mummy, Alex/Mutt]

Adventures in Academia [Indiana Jones/The Mummy, Alex/Mutt]

Lost in Translation [Indiana Jones/The Mummy, Alex/Mutt]

Thou Shalt Not [Robin Hood, Marian/Guy]

Five Minutes in Six Hours [Cold Case, Lilly/Scotty]

Lesbian Massage Thingummybob [Coupling, Jane/Sally/Susan]

pan metron ariston [Maurice, Maurice/Clive]
athousandwinds: (icon by hyel)
First line meme! Post the first line from all of your WiPs.

"The Bartons were welcoming, as Hilliard had been told they would be, though their eyes sometimes flickered over Hilliard's stripes and then up to his face as if they expected to see another – they did, of course."
- mostly involving Hilliard wandering round the Bartons' house being confused by all these well-adjusted people.

"Curio woke in – not darkness, exactly, but light blurred and dimmed in his vision, blotching purple and green as he blinked."
- five times Curio and Francisco quarrelled, part one of something which will probably never see the light of day.

"i. love suffereth long, and is kind"
- Richard/Alec, drabbles to the tune of I Corinthians 13, at which they fail.

"Haven't we met, you're some kind of beautiful stranger…"
- involving AU!Superhero!Noldor, Fingon apparently liking Madonna, don't ask

"I’ll never forget the day that bastard walked into my office."
- Noir!Elves AU, with Haleth as a hard-boiled PI investigating the theft of three priceless diamonds from a mob family, the Finwions.

"It was a pleasant domestic scene, such as might be found in any household on Kearny's Lane."
- Johanna manipulating the fuck out of Anthony. "I'll get some lye", indeed.

"She was so young in those days, a lovely little slip of a thing."
- this one about Mrs Lovett having an abortion

"His mother took one look at Johanna, wrapped up in a black shawl he'd bought from a pedlar on the road, and tutted."
- part of a potentially longer fic where Anthony tries to come to terms with the fact that his shiny new princess is irredeemably fucked-up.

"It is an assured fact that most English (or indeed, to give Moriarty and O'Hara their due, Irish) schoolboys will work hard, love honour and boxing, and above all, play the game."
- PG Wodehouse's school stories, which was a gift for someone. Never really worked out.

"Their hotel room in Pisa has a balcony and costs twice as much for that very reason."
- an Amon/Robin travelogue, post-series.

"The sights I could show thee, O sailor far from home
Who hath cross'd the blue sea in but a coracle."
- Medea/Jason scrapbook fic, part of which I'm trying to write in hexameter (as above), but I can't even face dactylic hexameter.

"“I don’t think I like myself any more,” he said in a faraway voice, so young and trembling like the aftermath of a storm."
- Nine meets Ovid, post-Time War.

""The TARDIS threw me out," the Doctor said mournfully, his hand on the doorbell."
- a weird Ten/Martha fic

"Thirty-three seconds ago, Donna was screaming for help."
- what time means to the Doctor.
athousandwinds: (icon by prettypictures)
[livejournal.com profile] fannish5Crossover relationships: Match five characters with their soulmates - from another fandom.

Ooh!

1. Alec (Swordspoint)/Marian (Robin Hood 2006). Alec desperately, desperately wants to protect the women in his life. Unusually for a male (anti-)hero, he does that by giving them tools to defend themselves rather than doing it directly. He failed with his sister Janine, so he forces Janine's daughter Katherine to take fencing lessons (and before long Katherine's protecting other women herself). He can't sponsor Flavia's education openly any more, so he founds a scholarship/mathematics chair for women.

Marian - you see where I'm going with this - is an explicitly feminist kick-arse swordswoman. Alec would love her. Marian would initially be infuriated by his attitude (because, let's face it, Alec's a bastard), but she'd probably end up seeing his hidden depths. She did with Robin, after all. I can't see Robin's hidden depths. Also, she'd probably be thrown off by the fact of his agreeing with her and not patronising her (well, not more than he normally would).

The only fly in the ointment is that Marian's as manipulative as hell and Alec needs a straight-shooter. Hmmmm.

2. John Hilliard (Strange Meeting)/Tohru Honda (Fruits Basket). He's an emotionally-repressed WWI soldier with a dysfunctional family and a lost love. She's an almost pathologically kind-hearted teenage girl with a talent for getting along with almost everybody. Hilliard kind of makes me think of Hatori in the same situation: completely closed-off to any kind of emotional support (not that he's getting it anyway) until he meets this one person. Tohru would be amazing at getting Hilliard to open up - think of how Hatori, Kureno and Yuki (all repressive types) respond to her. And he's a solicitous friend, even if he's not particularly good at helping. He'd look after her in the way she needs, which is that she works too hard and someone has to make her stop.

3. The Doctor (Doctor Who)/Miles Vorkosigan (the Vorkosigan books). Because they're both hyperactive, they both have the same method of procedure (make it up as you go along) and they both tend to take command by virtue of sheer arrogance. They also both have insanely loyal followers who frequently fall in love with them; the only difference is that Miles has more. Then again, the Doctor has quality-control. If they ever met, they'd likely be annoyed to death by each other. The Doctor would have an especially strong reaction: "You're a soldier?!" If Miles were a companion, he would probably attempt to change his own timeline. The Doctor might throw a fit like he did with Adam in "The Long Game"; possibly Miles would manage to charm his way out of it. Really, Miles is more likely to end up as a Brigadier Lethbridge-Stewart figure:

"Oh, you're back? Where've you been? I saved the universe five times while you were gone, you idiot!"

The Doctor would quickly start referring to Ivan as "that-idiot-Ivan" and it would infuriate Miles because hey, it's not like the Doctor's family. Only family (and the rest of the galaxy) get to call Ivan that.

...I bet the Doctor has a massive geeky historical crush on Cordelia, though. Like he did on Madame de Pompadour. And he'd keel over dead if she actually asked him to tea, omg. And Cordelia would so have the Doctor's number within five seconds of meeting him.

4. Sansa Stark (A Song of Ice and Fire)/Katherine Talbert (The Privilege of the Sword). Basically, Katherine is the knight of Sansa's dreams. I don't say Katherine's fencing foil would be much use against, say, Gregor, but she could totally take Littlefinger. And Katherine has experience defending rape victims. The Swordsman's Tragedy is exactly the sort of tosh Sansa would love; Katherine adores it. It would be Katherine/Artemisia all over again, but playing for higher stakes.

5. Count D (Petshop of Horrors)/Cain Hargreaves (Count Cain). It was a match made in heaven (Cain is clearly a cat in human form, from D's shop, given as a present from Alexis to Augusta) right up until the point where D discovered Cain was testing his poisons on animals. So he gave him a puppy, the sweetest dog in the world, who adored Cain and learnt to untie his shoelaces and snuffled at Cain's hands and licked his face when he was sad. And then the puppy grew up and turned out to be a rottweiler. Cain redeemed himself, though, when he decided he loved the dog regardless, and D gave him back his puppy. I am aware that this sounds crazy to anyone who doesn't know both fandoms, by the way. Very, very aware.
athousandwinds: (icon by prettypictures)
I am painting my room. It used to be a lovely dark blue from ceiling to skirting-board and now it is a rather dingy white.

Sometimes I wish the meaning of something was transferred straight from the author's head into the readers'. Then both sides would be happy: the reader would have perfect insight into the story and the author would know that the reader understood every word of their deathless prose. This would also kill all the wank about misinterpretation or obscure metaphors or the placement of semi-colons, and while on one hand this may sound a relief, with the other it would take down the entirety of academia.

Hobson's choice, really, except for how it's not.

I was reading Wodehouse's The Gold Bat last night. I made a handy-dandy list of characters to keep my attention on it. That is the downside of Project Gutenberg - it's so easy to lose track of what you're reading.

I was reading Susan Hill's Strange Meeting this morning and I have two questions for anyone on my flist who's read it, but especially [livejournal.com profile] just_marzipan:

What is Franklin's deal? He apparently dislikes Barton on sight and includes Hilliard with that. Is Hilliard right, and he's jealous of their friendship? Is he suspicious of it? Is he what Hilliard might have been had he not met Barton?

What was in the last, unfinished letter Barton wrote to his family that Miriam is so anxious Hilliard should see? Not just the ordinary news and philosophy, surely?

Profile

athousandwinds: (Default)
Angharad

September 2012

S M T W T F S
       1
2345678
9101112131415
16171819202122
23242526272829
30      

Syndicate

RSS Atom

Most Popular Tags

Style Credit

Expand Cut Tags

No cut tags